Practicing equanimity

I recently finished Thomas Sterner's 'The Practicing Mind' and there's a chapter on equanimity that I've been trying to practice and become more mindful of.

We unconsciously judge all the time ~ it's necessary for how we make our decisions.  Judgement requires the process of evaluation and comparison to an ideal.  These ideas of perfection - whether it be an item, experience or circumstance - stem from our perceptions of what is right/good or wrong/bad.  Making a decision we think is good/right makes us feel happy because we're approaching our ideal; wrong/bad decisions make us feel upset or sad.

As you can see, judgements are not exclusive of emotions.  How we feel is proportional to the importance of a decision.  For example my emotions are more detached while pondering what to eat for breakfast versus the morality of assisted suicide.  It is also important to point out that ideals (what is right and wrong) aren't always universal nor constant; they can change.  For example, back in the day you'd be ridiculed for believing the Earth is round.

One way to move towards equanimity is to escape this unproductive habit, by becoming aware of when you are involved in the process of judging.  Move towards being more objectively aware of yourself - detachment from the ego.  The ego is subjective.  It judges everything, including itself, and it is never content with where it is, what it has, or what it has accomplished.  Objectivity on the other hand exists in the present moment with no expectations - it does not judge anything as good/bad, instead sees a circumstance/action as 'being' and 'just is'.

For example, when you feel that someone is acting inappropriately toward you, that feeling comes from a judgement of the ego.  You must become aware of this, step back mentally and become more detached about the external stimuli.  Viewing the other person's ego ranting and raving with an unbiased perspective will have no affect on you.

Another example in the case of worrying too much.  Become aware of yourself fretting.  Observe the behaviour you want to change and then separate yourself from the act of worrying.  Realize that the emotions experienced have no effect on the problem you are stressing.  Try to look at the situation objectively and begin from there - instead of expending energy worrying use it to solve the problem.

Note that evaluating something is not the same as judging it.  Evaluation comes before the act of passing judgement.  Practicing this processes of detaching yourself from the ego is to staying aware that you have a choice in how you react to a feeling.  Accept a situation as it is and now as how your ego wants it to be.